Saturday, December 18, 2010

Bad Christmas Memories: Kill Gil, Volumes I & II

Well with this being December, one of the bleakest months of the year, I thought I'd take a look back at some Christmas themed episodes from this show that sucked. It's a sad idea that The Simpsons hasn't really been able to get Christmas episodes down. Outside of Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire and Marge Be Not Proud (I think it does not deserves all the hate it gets. I think it's a pretty good episode) the Christmas episodes really aren't worth it. So today we start off with possibly the worst one (Well outside the most recent one) that honestly makes me scratch my head for why it was even made. Let's take a look.

After our winter themed opening (Which I have to admit is a nice touch) we cut to a "Krusty on Ice" event that we find out is Christmas related (Wait I thought Krusty was Jewish... wait a second, they referenced that in Marge be Not Proud... Is anyone else getting a weird feeling about this?) After a scene where Krusty falls down on the ice (A lot) we get to see who else will be skating with Krusty (It doesn't really serve any purpose other than to help create a big fight later). After a few pointless scenes (I'm trying to not use pointless as much but seriously, they contribute nothing to the story) Krusty and Mel get two professional skaters to skate for them until the fireplace they're hiding in collapses. Afterwards, we get a scene where we're introduced to the Giant Chicken, er I mean the Grinch, er I mean the "Grumple" which goes nowhere and leads to a fight between the skaters and the basketball team that's about to play (Seriously, the only point to that scene was to establish the Grumple as the Giant Chicken to Homer).
Why can't you even look like an original character?!
After a few scenes in the Costingston's, we see Ol' Gil as Santa and Lisa asks him for a certain Malibu Stacy doll set that's sold out after saying she doesn't want world peace first (Okay, I know everyone wants to call bull on this, but remember; Lisa is just a little girl so as much as she wants world peace, she still wants a material present for Christmas. I don't really see this as an out of character moment for her at all). After Gil gets Lisa one of the sets from the stockroom, Mr. Costington confronts Gil about selling that particular doll set because he was holding it for his daughter (Hey, here's a though; Don't leave family presents in the store stockroom! I mean, what exactly was he thinking?) After Gil refuses to take the toy back from Lisa, he gets fired (Just want to say this; I cannot stand the Mr. Costington character, and considering who's he's probably a parody of gives me less of a reason to like him). Marge decides to invite Gil over for dinner and he accepts (Along with a scene that makes him out to be a big loser, don't find that funny, don't worry, the writers only do it 500 more times).
You see, the fanclub gave me your address...
After Marge tells Gil he can stay for the night, we see the next morning that Gil brought all his stuff over and is now living with them. Marge gets concerned about this but no time for that now, we need to buildup the "Homer-Grumple" rivalry for the end (Oh padding, I do love thee). Homer and Marge talk about Gil and Marge decides she'll kick him out. When marge goes to confront Gil, we get more of him being a loser and Marge decides to let him stay (This is essentially all of act 2, just copy and paste, add a little filler and you're done. Whatever happened to creativity in storytelling?) On New Year's Day, we see Gil is still there but he's expecting a call from his old boss for a job so Marge let's him stay (Rinse, lather and repeat. Next scene!) On Martin Luther King Day (Seriously?) Homer wants him out but Marge doesn't because he's still in need (Character consistency, who says your story needs it?) Homer then gets Marge to admit she can't say no to anyone... wait what?!
How can I make this pointless scene funny? hmmm.....
Does this make ANY sense to anybody who's ever watched Marge, EVER?! I don't even get why they felt the need to add this character trait to Marge for this episode, they couldn't just say that Marge was doing this out the goodness of her heart? This is just fucking retarded, it was hard enough to take this episode seriously before but this is the point where the episode lost me for good. However, being a reviewer, I still need to finish this so let's move on from that. So we then get a flashback of Marge saying no to Patty and Selma and as a result, she gets stuffed in her dollhouse... excuse me a moment *Screams expletives* Great development wouldn't you say? What's next? We find out that Homer is afraid of water bottles after being hit in the head with one in Elementary school one time? Anyways, Homer goes to Moe's to tell everyone there about how he has a problem with Marge not being able to kick Gil out. Carl suggests that Homer allow Marge to kick him out which Homer's a bit upset about. But no time for plot development, the Grumple appears and gets his ass beat by Homer (Seriously, even the Giant Chicken fights in Family Guy are amusing to watch, the fights between the two are not). After a montage to let us know that Gil has stayed at the house for close to a year (Mixed in with bits reminding us that Gil is a loser. You get that now? Yes? Well too bad, we're not going to stop. Oh yeah, it lasts for over 3 minutes, for anyone who wants to argue that this show's stories aren't good because of time constraint, I shake my head at you). Marge then erupts after seeing that he sent out family Christmas cards with his picture on them.
Marge goes to kick him out, but Gil's already left. Marge decides that she can't let that be a victory and she needs to confront him personally to say "No!" (Wow, this is just a stupid turn of events. I mean, in what universe is Marge this vindictive? Did the writers just forget who they were writing?). Marge decides she needs to go all the way to Scottsdale to kick him out herself (Okay seriously, this is worse than beating a dead horse. Marge is just being an asshole right now). When the family gets to Scottsdale, they find out that he's a big shot Realtor (Remember the last time Gil was a Realtor? Yeah I'm calling BS on this). When the family gets to the office Gil works at, Marge approaches Gil and tells him off in front of his co-workers and embarrasses him in front of them (Just a second ago, they were talking about him as if he were the second coming. This writing really sucks). Gil then gets fired by his boss (Who is a clone of his old boss. I give up on the creativity of this staff) and Marge feels sorry for costing him his job (No! I don't want this episode on an endless loop).
Merry Christmas, see you all next week
We then cut to a home in Scottsdale that the family apparently bought (Consistency! Why have a money joke about Homer making 6K a year then have them buy a house... wait). The episode ends with the Grumple coming to the house with his family to celebrate Christmas with them (Wait, I thought the Grumple was supposed to steal the Christmas spirit, screw it the episode's over).

Final Verdict: This episode sucks, the plot is stupid, it's not funny, it's repetitive for the second act, the pacing was just abysmal and inconsistent and all together, this episode was just a bad, forgettable episode. This episode seemed to seek out all the people who liked Gil and make them hate him by the end of it. Marge was severely out of character and just poorly written. The whole Grumple thing had no originality and was just filler.

Final Grade: 2.2/10 Just stay away from this one while celebrating Christmas

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